Bittersweet Learning

I was recently engaged in a conversation with a colleague I reconnected with after 5 years. We caught up over coffee one fine afternoon and the topic veered persistently over to how my life had changed (for the better!). I agree – it has, infact, so much so that it almost felt like I had always been in the food business ever since I graduated.

Contrary to the feeling, that evening I reminisced about how the years had passed by so quickly and why I was at the place I was in today. It was because of certain happenings in the past which drove me towards it.

I did not start with food as my core career focus. Food was always the side-kick, the accompaniment, the ‘hobby’. I would cook and experiment practically every day when I was in college and evolved my hobby into dreams with the prospect of ‘writing a cookbook’. Eventually leading up to the column I wrote for DNA way back in 2006 and starting my blog shortly after.

The blog and column were no means supportive of any substantial income for a person who was just starting to make a living (and a ‘post graduate’ to boot) and I would write for the love of creating a space for my passion. It also meant my slow transition upwards in the corporate world where I trudged from a business development role of a private firm to handling the complete office affairs of another private firm dealing in commodities. 8 long years.

The commodities firm was the last (ir)relevant place I was part of and when I look back it did teach me a lot, yet scarred me on my beliefs about how the corporate world works, especially when greed, lies and deceit form the basis of running a business and making money.

My original role when I joined was to look after the operational part of the business. The usual – from communications to assisting in trade strategies of various commodities to managing the clients who came in from all over the world. As I got more and more involved in the intricacies of the business, the responsibilities which piled up on my desk grew to decision powers albeit made on a lower level. I got signing authorities for trade related matters and Forex accounts to handle. These tasks were like testing new waters for me. While most of my colleagues were senior level, they were supportive enough to ride this new wave with me.

It was about 2 years into this looping corporate routine when my entire world tore apart. I reported as usual at 9AM in the morning and caught the headlines in the morning paper. The government had changed policies in a trade matter for one of India’s largest traded commodities (which we dealt in). It was an overnight decision and while I felt it might not affect us, it rang a bell on some activities which were a part of the trade we concentrated on as a core.

As the day progressed, I could sense a flurry of slightly disturbing activities – turns out, we were indeed embroiled in this controversy and things were not looking good. That day, I still remember clearly, was a day I was unknowingly dragged into as the front. The mere fact being that I was acting on instructions, but the law still recognised me as an employee representing the company. The bosses wanted to do anything in their power not to land up on the wrong side of the law, and buying time was crucial. We had the best law firm in the country handling the case and I had another role to play now, that of a legal nature. Armed with only the knowledge of law from my textbook days at my commerce graduate course, my sanity and the instructions of the attorneys, I burnt the midnight oil re-writing reports, reiterating incidents, crunching numbers and more with the core team involved and who were as clueless as me. The unfortunate part being the fact that most deals had my signature on them and I had to face the consequences. Trust me dealing with anything to do with (rather, against) the Government of India is a point of no return.

I had the natural course of thoughts of putting in my papers and quitting this altogether along with the fact that I would not take this issue home, but something kept holding me back from taking that decision. Excruciatingly, the case went through various stages, from fear to hope to manipulation to long hours at court houses and attorneys to finally winning it against the Government. The day we won, was the day I quit.

That was the day I realized I was not cut out for this part of the world. My passion lived elsewhere and opportunities would show up when I hope they would. They did, in various forms –

The first being my next job, since the (ex)company was in commodities and I was part of that very controversy which could have possibly affected the lower rung of the people involved in it i.e. the farmers. Shop for Change – a fair trade initiative which dealt with creating markets for poor and marginal farmers in the country was an opportunity which fell into my lap as a much needed “atonement”. At some level I felt responsible (even though I was not at fault, even by a whisker) for the incident I was involved with and this was my way of giving back to the sect of people we take for granted.

The second was resilience. I used to be extremely rigid in my thoughts and approaches in life. This incident scarred me but since I had to deal with it singlehandedly, it tweaked these very characteristics about me around. I changed the way I dealt with people and situations. I am a lot more judicious, flexible and versatile. I may not be perfect but I have definitely emerged wiser.

The third was food. More than anything, it opened up a whole new world of possibilities with food. I saw opportunities in everything I did around this world, be it my food writings, workshops, networking, cooking classes, collaborations and more. My social initiatives allowed me to interact with the folks at grassroots level and my writings exposed me to the luxurious world of food. It was the best of both worlds with a whole lot of learning.

Looking back, it’s true when people say the bitter experiences in your life usually make way for the better ones. People who hold on to this thought usually emerge stronger and some life’s experiences shouldn’t act like a deterrent to your goals.

Coming back to the dish which was inspired by this experience – I realized I had written up a recipe for the original Panna Cotta a few posts ago. It took me a long time to actually master the textures and properties of a Panna Cotta (with a few fails in between, thankfully my guinea pigs did not sue me). I was keen on working with other liquids and thought of coconut as one of the alternates to just ‘cream’. This recipe is a quite a fun one and very easy to put together. The coconut flavor adds another dimension to an otherwise milky Panna Cotta character and the blueberry compote adds that tart fruitiness to balance out the sweetness. I have added mint leaves to the compote to give it that fresh leafy bitterness. This takes care of most taste profiles and creates a unique yet satisfying dessert.

Coconut Panna Cotta with Blueberry-Mint Compote

Ingredients

For the Panna Cotta

• 400ml Coconut Cream (or 1 can)
• 400ml Coconut Milk (or 1 can)
• 1 sachet Gelatine (11gms)
• 100 gms Powdered Sugar
• 500ml Heavy Cream
• ¼ cup Water

For the Blueberry-Mint Compote

• 1½ cups Fresh Blueberries
• ¼ cup Sugar
• ½ Lemon – Juiced
• 1 tsp Lemon Zest
• 12-15 Mint Leaves
• Pinch of Salt

Meathod

• Sprinkle gelatine on the ¼ cup of water and leave aside to melt. If it does not in about 10 minutes, heat it lightly over a low flame, stirring continuously.
• In a heavy bottomed saucepan, heat the coconut cream and coconut milk together on a medium flame till it bubbles lightly. Pour in the gelatine mix and stir well.
• Place the vessel of the coconut-gelatine mix onto an ice-bath and stir gently till it starts to cool down and thicken. Be careful that it doesn’t start setting.
• Dissolve sugar into the heavy cream. Whisking briefly.
• Remove the coconut mix from the ice bowl and gently stir in the sugar-cream mix. Stir well. (do ensure the sugar is completely dissolved)
• Pour the Panna Cotta mix into smooth ceramic bowls and leave to set in the refrigerator for at-least 5 hours.

To prepare the compote

• Sprinkle sugar on the blueberries and keep in a heavy bottomed pan. Squish lightly.
• Once the fruit starts juicing and melding in with the sugar, transfer the pan over a medium flame and cook the blueberries with a wooden spoon.
• Stir around for about 15 minutes or till the mixture turns a bit jammy. Add in the zest and juice, you will notice the mixture thickening ever so slightly.
• Remove and season with salt.
• Slap the mint leaves on the palm of your hands and tear them into the compote. Leave to chill for about 1 hour (allows the flavors to infuse)

To serve – unmold the Panna Cotta onto large plates, spoon a tablespoon or two of the compote onto the Panna Cotta, scatter with mint leaves and if you get hold of this edible blue flower called “blue pea flower” or Bunga Telang”. This is a creeper plant flower used extensively in Penang for tea. It has a slight tart and floral flavor which goes well with the Panna Cotta’s flavor profiles as well as adds a certain level of beauty to the overall dish.

Incidentally, this flower grows on my bedroom window quite freely and till only recently I learnt that it was edible and makes for a fantastic blue hued tea. It is also used extensively in our religious ceremonies; it’s a flower of hope, divine intervention and serenity. Some of which relatively emerged during the weaker moments in my life.

This image was shot by a foodie friend – Amrita Rana. She’s as passionate a foodie and cook as I am and shoots for a living. View her work on her blog : Life Ki Recipe